Heads up, friends: this post has affiliate links, and if you shop with my code/link I may earn a little something at no extra cost to you. I only ever share what I genuinely love. 💛
Hey friends, it’s Lizzie! Somewhere along the way, the group hang stopped being dinner and drinks and turned into something way better: a whole day together, cameras out, everybody leaving with content they actually like of themselves. I don’t think it’s a trend. I think it’s the 30s figuring out what we actually want from our time with each other.
Why the girls day beat the girls night
In your 20s, the plan was dinner at 8, drinks after, home at 2. In your 30s? That plan costs you the entire next day, and half the group cancels by Thursday anyway. A girls day works because it fits the life you actually have. You get real daylight, real conversation, and you are home in time to sleep.
There is also the part nobody says out loud: you get pictures. Not the blurry 1am kind. The kind you are genuinely happy to post.
The photoshoot is not vanity, it is the activity
I used to feel a little silly about the idea of a friend photoshoot, like it was self-absorbed. I do not feel that way anymore. Here is what changed my mind: those photos are the only record any of us will have of this exact stretch of our lives. Your face right now. Your friends’ faces right now. The apartment, the car, the hair you will definitely have opinions about in five years.
And practically speaking, most women I know have almost no good photos of themselves that someone else took. We have selfies. That is not the same thing. A couple of hours with a friend who is willing to take forty shots of you fixes a problem you have probably had for years.
How to plan one that actually happens
The reason these fall apart is always the same: too many people, too little structure. What works:
- Three or four people, max. Past that, someone is always waiting around, and waiting kills the mood.
- Pick the date first, the plan second. Get it on calendars while everyone is enthusiastic, then figure out the rest in the group chat.
- Give it a start and an end time. “Eleven to four” gets a yes. “Let’s hang out Saturday” gets a maybe.
- One person owns the location. Not a democracy. Somebody picks, everybody shows up.
- Outfits in the chat the night before. Not to match — just so nobody shows up in a full gown next to someone in gym shorts.
Locations that photograph better than you think
You do not need somewhere expensive or far. What you need is decent light and a background that is not visually loud. Some that consistently work: the beach in the last hour before sunset, a coffee shop with big windows, any street with a clean colored wall, a botanical garden, a rooftop parking deck at golden hour, or honestly just someone’s backyard.
The one rule I would give you: go where the light is soft. Harsh noon sun is the single fastest way to make everyone look tired and squinty. Early morning or the hour before sunset will do more for your photos than any camera upgrade.
How to actually shoot it
You do not need a photographer. You need someone willing to take way more photos than feels reasonable.
- Take far more than you need. Forty shots to get three good ones is completely normal. That is the real ratio, even professionally.
- Move between every shot. Shift your weight, look away, walk toward the camera, laugh at something. Stillness is what makes photos look stiff.
- Burst mode is your friend for anything with motion — walking, twirling, hair flips.
- Shoot from slightly below eye level for full-body shots. It is the most flattering angle for almost everyone and nobody does it by accident.
- Get the in-between moments. The best photo of the day is almost never the posed one. It is the one right after, when everyone is laughing at how the posed one went.
If nobody wants to be stuck behind the phone all day, a tracking tripod solves it — it follows you around so everyone can be in the shot. I use the Pivo Pod for exactly this, and code LILO takes a little off. Not required, just genuinely useful when it is a group and you want everybody included.
The unspoken rules
A few things that keep this fun instead of stressful:
- Everyone gets their turn. If one person is shooting all day and never gets photographed, you did it wrong.
- Shoot each person on their own phone. When it is your turn, hand over your phone. You walk away with your photos already in your camera roll — nothing to wait on, nothing to chase down later.
- If someone has a nicer camera or phone, be patient with them. Sometimes one person’s setup is genuinely better and it makes sense to shoot everything on theirs. Trust that your friend will send them over as soon as she can. Transferring and editing take real time, and those shots are worth the wait.
- Do not post someone else’s bad angle. Obvious, but worth saying. Let people veto their own pictures, no questions asked.
- Nobody has to be “on.” If someone would rather be in two photos and mostly just hang out, that is a completely fine way to spend the day.
My honest take
What I love about this is that it gives the day a shape. “Let’s catch up” is nice, but it is vague, and vague plans die. “Let’s go take pictures at the beach and then get food” is something people actually show up for. The photos are the excuse. The point is that you spent five hours with people you love instead of texting them about how you should really hang out sometime.
And you end up with proof of it. That is not a small thing.
Frequently asked
Do I need a real camera?
No. A recent phone is genuinely fine, and good light matters far more than the device. Shoot in portrait mode for individual shots and normal mode for group ones.
What if I am awkward in front of a camera?
Everybody is at first. The trick is to keep moving and to be doing something — walking, adjusting your hair, actually talking to the person next to you. Awkwardness comes from standing still and waiting.
How long should it take?
Give the photo part an hour, tops. Past that it stops being fun and starts feeling like work. Then go eat.
What should we wear?
Solid colors photograph better than busy patterns, and it helps if the group is roughly in the same register. Beyond that, wear what makes you feel good — it shows.
