Hey friends, it’s Lizzie! So here’s the thing I need you to know before you watch what’s coming: I love that man. Truly. But right now I’m on Day 5 of 7 of making my fiance Brandon do social media trends with me, and let’s just say his patience is being tested in real time. There’s a moment in this one where I look genuinely fed up with him, and I need to say for the record: this is just a trend. I’m not normally mad at him. Ever. (Okay, rarely.) We were laughing about it two seconds after I hit stop.
But honestly, this whole silly little 7-day challenge got me thinking about WHY we keep doing dumb stuff like this together, and why I think it’s one of the sneaky-best things we do for our relationship. So today I want to talk about how to keep your relationship fun in your 30s, because I really believe playfulness is the glue nobody tells you about. Here’s the exact moment below 👇
▶ Watch this Reel on Instagram — @sealillly
Why silly is actually serious business
Somewhere in your 30s, life gets very… adult. There are bills and calendars and dentist appointments and “did you move the laundry over.” Real love in this decade isn’t candlelit dinners every night, it’s teamwork on a Tuesday. And that’s beautiful! But if you’re not careful, the two of you can slowly turn into very efficient roommates who split logistics really well and forget to actually PLAY.
That’s the trap. And the antidote, at least for Brandon and me, is being willing to look ridiculous together on purpose. When I rope him into a trend he thinks is stupid (his words, lovingly), we’re doing something bigger than making a Reel. We’re reminding each other that we don’t take ourselves too seriously. We’re choosing each other’s company over doom-scrolling on opposite ends of the couch. That, to me, is the whole answer to how to keep your relationship fun in your 30s: keep choosing to be goofy on purpose, even when the to-do list is screaming.
Real, doable ways to add fun back in
I’m not going to tell you to “prioritize date night” and call it a blog post, because we both know that’s easier said than done. So here’s the actually-doable stuff we lean on.
1. Say yes to the dumb trend
You don’t need a following or a ring light. The magic isn’t the video, it’s the two of you fumbling through choreography in the kitchen and cracking up when someone messes up the count. Pick a trend, force your partner into it, and film exactly one take. The behind-the-scenes bloopers are always better than the “real” version anyway. Ask Brandon.
2. Bring back mini-dates
Full date nights need a plan, a reservation, sometimes a babysitter. Mini-dates need almost nothing. Ours look like a 20-minute walk down to the water at sunset, splitting a coffee, or driving to get one specific snack and eating it in the car like teenagers. Low stakes, high payoff. If you want more of this energy in your everyday, I wrote a whole thing about how to romanticize your everyday life in your 30s, and it plugs right into this.
3. Protect your inside jokes
Inside jokes are relationship currency. That one phrase you say that makes zero sense to anyone else but sends you both into hysterics? That’s intimacy. Keep making them. Repeat them. Text them at random. Brandon and I have running bits from years ago that we will absolutely still be quoting when we’re 80, and I wouldn’t trade them for anything fancier.
4. Do the thing your partner loves (even if it’s not your thing)
I dragged Brandon into content creation. In return, I show up for the stuff he’s into with real enthusiasm, not the polite-nod kind. Taking turns being the one who says “okay, let’s do YOUR weird hobby today” keeps it fair and keeps it fun. Playfulness goes both ways or it curdles into one person always performing.
5. Keep a tiny “yes” list
When one of you suggests something spontaneous and a little silly, the default answer should lean toward yes. Spontaneous kitchen dance party? Yes. Bad reality TV marathon? Yes. Re-shoot the trend because you fumbled it? Ugh, fine, yes. Saying yes to silliness is a muscle, and it gets weak fast if you don’t use it.
The mindset behind all of it
Here’s what I’ve learned in my 30s, both from a decade of kickboxing (where you learn real quick not to take a bad round too personally) and from building a life with someone: the couples who stay light are the couples who stay close. Not light as in shallow. Light as in they refuse to let every little friction become A Whole Thing.
When Brandon huffs through a trend, I’m not actually mad, and he’s not actually annoyed, because we’ve both silently agreed that this is a game, not a battle. That agreement is everything. It’s the difference between “you’re being annoying” and “we’re being annoying together, isn’t this great.” A lot of staying fun is really just a decision to interpret each other generously and laugh first. If you’re into rewiring how you see the small stuff, these fun mindset shifts for your 30s pair perfectly with everything I’m saying here.
So if you take one thing from this, let it be this: how to keep your relationship fun in your 30s isn’t a grand-gesture problem, it’s a tiny-choices problem. Choose the walk. Choose the dumb video. Choose to laugh at the fumbled take instead of sighing at it. Choose your person, on purpose, over and over, in small silly ways. That’s the good stuff. That’s the whole decade, honestly. ✨
Now I want to hear from YOU: what’s your go-to way to keep things fun and goofy with your partner? Drop it in the comments, I’m always stealing new ideas (and Brandon is bracing himself). 💛
And if you want to see the full chaos of us doing these trends, come hang out with me over on Instagram @sealillly. Day 6 is going to be a mess, and I mean that with love. 🌴
